In the last post ‘Let Go’ I talked a bit some of my past and how I developed some unhealthy mindsets and based a lot of my identity on what I achieved and pleasing people.

Here in Iceland I feel that I am in a process of ‘unlearning’ unhelpful mindsets. I will talk about ‘unlearning’ in my next post, but before that I want to focus on what it means to ‘become like a little child’. These few verses in Mark’s gospel are absolutely transforming my heart at the moment:

And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them ‘Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it’. And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them. (Mark 10:13-16)

On the surface, this passage has often been used simply to demonstrate that Jesus loves children. And that’s true! In the society of the day, children and women were the underdogs of society, having very few rights and reliant on men for their income. In the passage immediately before this one, Jesus talks about divorce and proclaims the rights and welfare of women, who were often easily divorced by men, leaving them with no income or care. Here, Mark, writing with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, shows how Jesus also treats children as being of utmost importance in the Kingdom of God. (Remember that when we read a passage of scripture, there is always a link to the passages before and after which is often the key to unlocking the revelation it contains). So Jesus moves from promoting the value of women to promoting the value of children, just as the disciples are trying to usher the children away, presumably because they think Jesus has more important people to deal with (i.e men). So, the simple revelation from this passage is that Jesus welcomes and values children just as much as he does adults. However, there is a much deeper revelation here about how we are to live our journey with God, and it is this I want to focus on.

Jesus, using the children in his arms as a powerful visual aid, tells those listening that whoever does not RECEIVE the kingdom of God like a child shall not ENTER it.

This is huge. He is telling everyone that to enter the kingdom of God you have to become like the people in society who have the least rights and are treated as the least important. In fact you cannot ENTER the kingdom, without RECEIVING it.

Think for a moment about some young children you know, maybe your own kids or those of friends or family. Think about how they live life. They have no personal income, no ability to look after themselves, to make plans for their life, to be independent. They are completely reliant on their parents for EVERYTHING. They cannot bargain and use their skills or income to acquire anything. They cannot sign a job contract or open a bank account. All they can do is RECEIVE from their parents. Food, clothes, love, stimulation, education…the list goes on. None of this is earned, it is all RECEIVED. In a healthy family, the children have joy and simplicity, and a complete looking to their father and mother to give, show and teach them all they need to know. They do not try to devise schemes to plan for the future, because they know their parents are taking care of it.

Now go back and re-read the passage I quoted from Mark, keeping these thoughts about children in your head and heart.

Jesus says the kingdom of God can only entered by receiving it like a child. You cannot earn, or bargain your way in by your works or status or income or skills. That would be coming like an adult, instead Jesus invites us to come like a child. Empty handed, with nothing apart from eyes on your Father in heaven and an expectation he will take care of everything.

I realised when I was reading this that for much of my journey with God I have come to him as an adult son, not as a small child. I have assumed my relationship with God is a similar to my relationship with my parents now. My parents are loving and supportive, and I chat to them regularly and they give me help and encouragement. But I am a grown adult and I am no longer reliant on my parents for everything. I can take care of myself, make my own income, live my life how I want to live, while still maintaining a healthy relationship with my parents. This is all good and how it should be. BUT, when it comes to my relationship with God, I am not required to come as an adult son, but as a little child.

This is SO important, I’m going to say it again. We are not invited to come before God as an adult son or daughter, but as a small child. 

I realise now that my relationship with God has been similar to that as an adult with my parents, where I would speak to him regularly, gain encouragement and advice, feel loved and supported , BUT I would still remain independent and not reliant wholly on him for everything. I worked, had my savings, had plans for my life, made sure I stayed out of debt and tried my best to love others around me. I’m not saying it is wrong to have an income or savings of course. I’m not suggesting everyone reading this gives up their jobs or gives away all their savings. I actually believe God wants to trust us to be a good steward of finances. But if we are to enter the fulness of the Kingdom, and discover who God is and who we are, we need to come like a small child, whatever that means for you. The key is giving up our independence and right to do everything our way, and to be reliant on ourselves. That doesn’t mean we instead become reliant on others, but on God the Father.

For me, it has literally meant giving up my job, status, and savings and moving country to simply follow Jesus and the things he has put on my heart. Even then, it has taken me a while to make myself like a little child, and of course I am still learning. I now have no savings, a small income but much more freedom and joy than ever before and an increasing realisation that I can rely on God for everything. And when we start to receive God’s kingdom like a child, its much more fun than trying to be in control.

I’ll finish with a story of something which happened just a few days ago.

About a month ago I had been praying and really wanted to eat in a nice restaurant. I don’t have the income to do so, but love fine dining, just because of the creativity and flavours of food cooked by top chefs. When I had a good income in London, I could afford to eat out at a really nice restaurant once a month, but now I cannot do this from my own means. I prayed, like a small child reliant on his Father, that he would give me the opportunity to eat in a top restaurant in Iceland occasionally. So, a few days ago I was returning from taking a friend of mine home to a farm in the south of Iceland, about 2 hours away from Reykjavik. It was about midnight and on the way home I saw from a distance a car with its hazard lights on, pulled over to the side of the road. As I neared the car I realised two men were waving at me. I had to make one of those quick decisions on whether I stopped or not, but felt in my heart it was right to pull over and see if I could help. The two men asked if I was going to Reykjavik, and if they could come with me as their car had broken down and they needed to catch a flight to northern Iceland first thing in the morning. I welcomed them into the vehicle I was driving and drove them the hour or so back to Reykjavík. I chatted to them as I drove and they told me they were chefs who were cooking for the film director Ridley Scott and his film crew who are currently filming a movie in Iceland. The older man of the two was in charge of 10 other chefs cooking for a film crew of 350! He is also the owner of a top restaurant here in Iceland, cooking Icelandic cuisine. When I dropped them off at their house he told me he wanted to invite me to dine for free at his restaurant, a lobster dinner or whatever else I wanted! The restaurant is 10 minutes walk from where I live so I am going there in a few weeks to enjoy some fine dining

The point of me telling this story is that this whole thing never would have happened if I hadn’t positioned myself like a small child and come to the place of relying on God  for both my needs and my wants. I could have saved what I could each month and eventually after 6 months or so had enough to eat at a mid-range restaurant. But instead I came asking God he would make a way for me and I happen to randomly give a car ride to one of Iceland’s top chefs stranded in a remote location who gives me a personal invite to his restaurant. I could never have arranged that independently. Only me becoming more like a little child and resting in the arms of my Father in heaven can unlock these type of adventures and blessings! And its so much fun!

So I would just encourage you to meditate on the scripture above, and ask what prevents you from being like a small child? In what ways is your relationship with God more like that of an adult son or daughter  where you maintain most of your independence than a small child completely dependent on Him?

Do you spend a lot of time working out how to plan for your future and worrying how you are going to take care of yourself? Do you fear losing your independence and maybe if you’re honest that you can take care of yourself better than God can? I encourage you, from my own experience, to simply trust God, ask how you can become more child like, and where you act independently of Him out of fear or desiring to be in control. His perfect love will cast out all fear as you learn to rest, like a small child, in His arms.

I have SO much more to say on this! Watch out for another post very soon

REST.

This is what is on my heart to talk about, because it is what I’m learning, and writing is made all the more powerful when the writer is writing about his current experience. This will  need a number of separate posts, as I want to try to explore this theme….

At the moment I am only scratching the surface of this revelation, and maybe as I write more will be revealed.  I feel I must dwell here on this subject for a while, maybe weeks or months, who knows! There is something so powerful about this, I actually believe that this is the KEY revelation of this season for many of us, and a doorway to entering into all God has for us.

So, first of all I want to give some raw and honest testimony of why this revelation is so important to me and how I went on a bit of a detour for a while in my own life.

As I neared the end of my twenties, I one day began to realise I was becoming very performance oriented. This seemed to be the opposite of how I had been in my teens and early twenties. I couldn’t quite work out how I got this way. I have great parents who didn’t base their acceptance of me on how well I performed, but showed me unconditional love. I have always been a natural perfectionist, but this didn’t seem to account for why I now seemed to feel a weight of responsibility on my shoulders and like I was trying to prove myself all the time. What had happened to the laid back me of a few years before? Its only very recently that I have realised the answer to this question.

I began a job when I was in my mid-twenties, managing a housing estate in central London. I had a couple of successive promotions until  I was managing a team of 7 people and overseeing the management of about 2000 properties and the residents. Those of you not from the UK, you need to understand that some of our inner-city housing estates are not full of Hugh Grant or Keira Knightley types sitting round sipping champagne and hosting dinner parties, but rough, real and ready places where there are many people with myriads of problems, be it drugs, mental health, physical health, young teenagers stealing cars, arsonists setting fire to everything, prostitution, despair. Obviously there are good things as well, community spirit, people looking out for their neighbours etc. But my role was not just managing a portfolio of properties but managing the chaos that often results from thousands of very broken lives being concentrated in one area. I had been given a lot of responsibility at a fairly young age.

Although I enjoyed the responsibility initially, I soon realised that the buck always seemed to stop with me, as I was known as the person with overall responsibility for the whole estate. Therefore, if someones heating went wrong, and it wasn’t fixed in time, I was the one the person would come to if things weren’t resolved, the same if someone had had their car vandalised, or their window smashed. People often need someone to hold responsible, a named person who can be held to account. Now, obviously there was a team of very able people in my team who often got things resolved before my involvement was needed. But when there was need for money-saving cuts, I ended up having to manage the same housing estate with 4 instead of 7 people. We were already at full stretch with 7 in the team, and now i had to manage the same problems, the same size estate with far less. Soon things were beginning to fall apart at the seams, and I was in a place where I had to try to hold together something which was failing, and to everyone on the outside it looked like it was my lack of competence. Then people above me also decided that things were going wrong due to my lack of experience. It was like one of those movies where someone is innocent but nobody believes them, and then they set out to clear their name. I felt I was doing everything I could to the best of my ability but people still thought I was to blame if things went wrong.

Gradually I began to work harder and harder, longer and longer in an attempt to get everything done that I didn’t have time to do in normal office hours. I didn’t get paid for this extra time, it was just the drive not to feel like a failure. But still I began to realise I wasn’t superman and no amount of hard work could keep everything from going wrong.

Now time to be even more honest: There were days when the pressure of trying to please my bosses, trying to look after my team and trying to please a demanding client and residents groups caused me to break down in tears, a grown man, in an office, sobbing. Not from self-pity, just the tears that come from the stress of trying to hold together something which is actually outside of your control. I remember several occasions of breaking down in my office, then taking a deep breath, going to the bathroom, washing my face, gritting my teeth and then walking out to chair a meeting or meet an angry resident. Maybe my youth, inexperience and perfectionism did play a part in the way I handled these times of my life. Maybe now I would handle things much differently. Somehow I got through these times and eventually I left the company, realising i needed to leave for my own sanity.

So, why have I shared all of this?

I believe during that period of work I picked up habits and thought patterns that I let influence my view of God and life in general. I changed from a sometimes too relaxed guy into a stressed out shadow of my former self. And I let the mentality of a stressful workplace take root in my mind so I carried this into other areas of life, especially my relationship with God.

Quite often we assume most of our emotional problems must stem from childhood but they can often be from work or other situations where we have had negative authority figures or expectations, we subconsciously learn a mindset and then carry that mindset into other areas.

For me, I have realised I had developed a mindset where I thought I had probably not done enough to gain God’s blessing and favour, maybe I had not covered all my bases, maybe if I prayed a bit more, read the Bible a bit more, been a bit more bold, more loving, more motivated, then I would see breakthrough. Because of the mindset learned from trying to meet unrealistic expectations at work, I began to try to achieve to earn both the favour of God and of man.

I also felt a responsibility for everything and everyone, and that if something didn’t happen it was my fault. Therefore I started to carry unnecessary burdens, and this resulted in a lot of stress. After a while I realised I hardly spent any time with God, resting or relaxing but was always trying to work, achieve and carry the burdens of everyone around me.

I am now here in Iceland after a long journey of learning to let go, realising the world is much better in God’s hands than mine. I left job, family, friends, financial security and career prospects to come here. I was tired of trying to build my own great life for myself and just desired to learn what it really means to follow Jesus, and run empty handed into his presence. The first reason I believe God put it on my heart to come here was to rest and learn to be me without all the excess baggage. I also feel like this is just the beginning of a much more exciting journey of just trusting in God and not myself.

So, just a few thoughts to finish which may provoke you to think:

1) What unhelpful ways of thinking and acting have you picked up from childhood, school, relationships, work, or even church? Are you striving to prove yourself or prove something to others? Do you feel like you are never quite good enough and always have to do something extra to make the grade? Maybe you have been rejected and feel like you have to work extra hard to gain peoples’ acceptance? It’s good to identify these things and just bring it before God

2) Are you simply doing too much? I know you may have children, job, a house to look after and its easy for me to say that. But creating space in your life to rest and also to be with the Lord, in fact making it your priority, could be the key to the rest of your life. Sometimes we cannot receive all that God has for us because we are too busy holding onto things which we picked up in the race to achieve or prove ourselves. Creating space is the only way to begin to discover what’s really on your heart and drown out the constant active voices urging you to do and achieve.

3) Is your identity based upon what you achieve, what you do, or is it in knowing you are God’s child? You’d be surprised how many of us are trying to become someone, when we already are a vastly superior ‘someone’ than the one we are trying to become.

4) When Jesus called his disciples they had to leave what they were doing and follow him. They left their jobs, financial security, possessions, homes, sometimes friends and family… Is there anything you are doing which is rooted in your own need for identity that you need to leave behind in order to discover your identity as a child of God? An advert in the airport reads ‘Life flows better when you can travel light’…do you need to travel more lightly?

5) Patience. We often are impatient to let God lead us into his destiny for us and so we start making decisions to try to create our own destiny for ourselves, and sometimes let the good get in the way of the best. Some of our worst decisions can come from just being impatient, and in my experience sometimes a 2nd best solution always presents itself just before the best. Obviously there are times we have to do things we don’t really want to do for a season but be very careful of making big decisions about career, big commitments, relationships etc before asking if this is really on your heart and is this God’s absolute best for me?

So, a lot of heavy stuff in this post….but please think about it, I am really convicted that many of us have incredible journeys and destinies to enter into when we take the risk of following Jesus out of everything which we have built for our own security and learn to let go and rely only on Him.

I have so much more to say, I plan to post once a week over the summer just on this subject! So please keep reading

Sometimes staying is harder than leaving. Not that I desire to leave Iceland, but just that when you leave you normally leave with some kind of plan, some kind of adventure, and when you stay, life just carries on, except you are without the friends who just left.

I stayed contemplating with my coffee cup for another 20 minutes. Thinking of all the goodbyes I had said in this very spot over the past few months, and all the emotions I had gone through of 7 years of arriving and departing from this place.

I thought of all my memories of Iceland, of all the new friendships that have been formed here, of all the laughter, tears, road trips, significant encounters with God. How much has changed in my life in this land in just over a year.  It then struck me, that in times of uncertainty or difficulty we often look back to past memories and assume the best has already been. We look back fondly at the ‘good old days’ and the photographs, and start to wonder if that is it, especially when we can’t see what is ahead. Now, there’s nothing wrong with memories and remembering good times. But I guarantee that before the good times there were other difficult times. Another time when you wondered if there would be good times ahead. And probably the latest good memories are more enjoyable than the old memories, because over time memories build like layers. So I started to think about the good times ahead, the friendships, fun, laughter, God encounters that I was yet to walk into. That I would one day be looking back fondly at memories of things that haven’t happened yet. And that maybe those future memories would be even better than the ones already in the past.

When we walk through hard and lonely times, it’s important to remember God has a much wider perspective than we do. I can easily be affected by the emotion of how I feel on a particular day, and let that dictate my perspective on the rest of my life. God has an aerial view and an see all the valleys and mountains where as we see the perspective from the ground.

Through a lot of the Old Testament, God was constantly reminding Israel how he had led them out of Egypt, how he performed miracles and brought them into the promised land. The reason was, that God is consistent to act on behalf of his people, and as he had been faithful in the past, so he would do so again.

So here’s some things I’m learning through the hard times:

1) Be thankful for the friends and people in your life, whether absent or present. God has put specific people in our lives for specific reasons, some for a season and some for life. Just has God has provided in the past, he will continue to do so because his character is consistent and his name is faithful.

2) Keep a journal regularly. I have journals going back years, and if I want to be reminded of God’s goodness I just go back and remind myself of all the things the Lord has done for me, and it reminds me that he will continue to be good to me because he loves me so perfectly.

3) Remind yourself of the promises God has given you. Think of the prayers already answered and promises already fulfilled, meditate on them, whether specific verses of scripture or prophetic words you have been given. Claim them and ask God to fulfil those words!

4) Praise God, even when its the last thing you feel like doing. Sometimes I have had the most amazing times of worship when I have felt heavy and despairing, and praise has taken everything I have but has changed the atmosphere around me and expanded my faith.

5) Ask God about the people around you, who are the key people right now, brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers in the faith. It could be your natural family or your friends. Who are the people who can keep you connected to your destiny and can urge you to press into seek God during the hard times, who can speak life over you and remind you of your true identity? Seek these people out and be intentional about connecting with them and praying with them!

6) Rest in God. You cannot earn God’s favour by striving or hard work. You are already a son and daughter of the King and nothing can add or take away from that. You already have everything you need in Him, he has gone ahead and provided for this season. Sometimes I strive for a breakthrough and this means I miss what is in fact a gift. Make sure you get plenty of physical rest and have a lifestyle which is not based around endless activity, even if this means giving some things up. You will get far more achieved by resting in God than running around in your own strength. I don’t always understand how this principle works, but trust me, it does! Bill Johnson said ‘When I am resting in the presence of God I get far more done by accident than I used to get done on purpose’

Anyway, just some thoughts…hope this helps anyone going through a hard season of their life!

Living arrangements

We have now been living nearly 3 months in our amazing new apartment, although it is proving expensive so we have handed in our 6 month notice.  We initially thought we could make it work but we have since realised there are much cheaper options out there and we are paying more than we need to. When we initially moved in there was little movement on the housing rental market, but this seems to have changed. However, we are enjoying the blessing that the apartment brings and have a couple of new housemates, firstly our friend Ingunn, who will be moving very soon to the upstairs room, to replace Roger who lived with us for a few months but is now moving out. Also we have the wonderful Sarah from Australia who is staying in the ‘den’ in the living room for a few weeks, which is like a little bed space under the sloping roof, very cosy.

I am now working in Café Rót, run by my good friends from YWAM. I am loving working there, it is very much a ‘community’ café feel, it’s much more than somewhere to get coffee. Many customers come in and spend the whole day here, and there’s always people to talk to. There is a wide diversity of people who come in from alternative teenagers to Tango dancers and political activists, so there’s never a dull moment. I recently splashed out on coffee making (barista) training with a lady called Sonja Grant, a former world Barista champion and now a judge at the world coffee championships. She runs an amazing café called Kaffismiðjan, easily the best coffee house in Iceland, and perhaps the world, who knows! Although the training was expensive, I got 3 hours one-on-one training which will put me in a good place should I need to get a 2nd café job when my money begins to run out next year…it was amazing to learn from someone who is such a coffee perfectionist and talent.

In the basement of Café Rót is a prayer room we have sent up in conjunction with YWAM. We did a week of 24-7 prayer earlier in the year. I am now looking to develop this prayer room and get some artists together decorate it to make it more creative so that people can engage with God in creative ways, whether through music, art, or something else.

YWAM are currently running a Discipleship Training School here in Reykjavík, and they have an amazing group of seven students, one from Iceland, one from Germany and the rest from the States. I have had the privilege of being able to teach a couple of seminars on the school, one about prayer and one on the Image of God. I have a passion to teach the Bible, I just love doing it! I have one more seminar I will be teaching in December about Celtic Christianity. I am hoping for more doors to open to use this gift next year.

I’m progressing quickly with learning the Icelandic language, and am currently doing an intensive language learning course this month, two hours each weekday for five weeks, and then there are further levels I can progress to after this initial course finishes. I am gradually realising I will be here for the longer term and so really want to invest in learning the language and its complicated grammar. Someone told me to day there are 16 different grammatical forms of the noun ‘horse’ so I think it will take me a long while to be fluent, but I’m happy to make gradual improvement each week.

I am continuing slowly but surely with my online digital photography course, and am learning a lot and my photography is definitely improving.

I had the opportunity to cook the starter for a fundraising meal for my friend Þorgils who is a DTS student here. With the help of some of the other students I somehow managed to cook a butternut squash risotto for 50 people on a small stove! That was a miracle in itself…I enjoy cooking and hospitality, the only problem is food is really expensive here so I can’t entertain or throw dinner parties as much as I’d like!

I I recently spent a week at the Iceland Airwaves music festival with Eric and my friends Matt and Steph from London. Airwaves is an international music festival held at different venues around Reykjavík and we  heard some incredible bands. In particular, Icelandic bands Andvari, Miri, Seabear, For a Minor Reflection, Svavur Knútur, Mukkalo, Uni, Lay Low and Sóley. Also, Danish band ‘Alcoholic Faith Mission’ and UK band ‘Codes in the Clouds’ really impressed me. In so many shows I felt the presence of God in the music, making it a really deep and profound experience. There is something really special about the music here, and there are so many bands who deserve to be heard by a wider audience. It really inspired me to get creative and following the festival I picked up a guitar for the first time in 12 years and wrote a few songs which was incredible, as I could only remember a few chords. I don’t have a career in singing, and my guitar playing is very rusty but I do enjoy writing lyrics and tunes so maybe if I find a band or singer to write for I could progress this a little bit.

I also have a potential opportunity to go to the Westmann Islands, a small group of volcanic islands off the south coast of Iceland where we have a friend who has studio space to practice music. I would love to get back into drumming, and was so inspired by Airwaves. I am feeling a real draw to the music industry and Eric is in the process of setting up his own record label and God is opening amazing doors for him to work with Icelandic bands here. I have a real passion to work alongside Eric to see God move in the music scene, and although I have no idea quite how I’m going to be used yet, I am really excited by the potential here. There is a real spiritual openness among many musicians and the potential for musicians to have divine encounters through their music is huge. Will keep you updated about how this all develops.

I am quickly running out of money, and will need an additional source of income in January or February, whether a second job or raising support. It feels crazy to be in this position but sometimes following God is doing what seems crazy because God is calling me to trust Him with everything I have….and I’m definitely now living from my heart and not just from my head and the adventure is well and truly underway!!!

More posts soon with more reflective thoughts…

There have been quite a few changes recently…

Firstly, I have now moved into a new home! We felt the time was right to move on from the café (Glætan) where we were living in Laugavegur, the main street. We were praying that we would get new accommodation somewhere quite central. Eric viewed one place near the domestic airport but there were about 20 people viewing at the same time, there is so little movement on the housing rental market here that any new place attracts a lot of interest. We told them we were interested but the owner selected someone else to rent to. The same agent then told us about the place we are now living in. We looked around and were amazed and how beautiful the place is, a funky kitchen and bathroom and large, light living room on the top floor and 2 balconies! (Nice for the summer and hopefully a good view of the Northern Lights in the winter). It is a bit more expensive than you would normally pay for this size flat but the design and layout really make it feel bigger than it is. We are planning on renting a room to a 4th person which will make it more affordable for us. The location is about 10 minutes walk from the centre of town, not far from Hlemmur, the bus station.  The thing we most love about the place is that is is perfect for hospitality, with room for 8 people to sit and eat in the kitchen and about 20 people in the living room. So we are well and truly blessed with this place! And its a minor miracle we managed to rent it considering all the competition!

I now no longer work in Glætan, so will need a job before too long. I will be back in UK for a month from 20th August, and when I return to Reykjavík on 21st September I will need to start looking for something. The savings I have a the moment will last a lot less now I am paying rent.

Eric and I are now meeting with Tyler , one of our friends from YWAM to work on a book. We would like to write a basic introduction to the Bible for new believers, with a particular emphasis on the bigger story of the Bible, rather than something focussed on isolated verses or passages. We are learning a lot from each other just by meeting and discussing the theology and application of different parts of the Bible It’s a long term project rather than something we will finish in a few months but the idea is that a book comes out of our corporate discussion together.

I recently began an online digital photography course with the Photography Institute which is helping me improve my technical and camera knowledge. Some of the assignments are written and others involve submitting my photographs for comments by an experienced pro photographer, which will be really helpful. The beauty of the online course is that I don’t have to go anywhere for a class and can also do the course in my own time, without specific deadlines, apart from having the whole thing completed in a year. I have also met a good photographer here in Iceland (our friend Lilja) who is helping me to improve and is keeping my inspired by her amazing shots.

I am yet to start drumming but I have decided to firstly concentrate on the photography and will hopefully take up drumming again once the light starts fading and  the darkness rolls in for a long winter….what better way to help pass those dark nights than to practice rudiments, grooves and stick technique? I will firstly need a drum kit and somewhere to practice though!

I will be leaving Iceland for a month to go back  to the UK and see my family, celebrate my niece Sophie’s 4th birthday and meet my new niece, Alice, born on 20th July. If anyone is around in the Essex and London areas between 20th August and 2nd September for catching up, would be great to see you! Following this time back home I will be doing some travelling in the Shetland and Orkney Islands, Scotland for 11 or 12 days with some friends  and then heading to Edinburgh for the annual 24-7 Prayer gathering from 16th September before returning to Iceland on 21st September…

I promise to keep more updated with my blog from here on and to write some more articles about life in Iceland, my weird thoughts on things, views on politics and theology and anything else!

Please keep reading…..

My new niece Alice

Glætan

I started work in Glætan, the café I am living above. I am working 10 hours a week, so I have been getting used to the café environment and how to do everything. They have introduced me gently, I started with washing dishes and learning the till, now I am making and preparing food and cleaning the cafe. I am still learning how to use the Gaggia coffee machine, but the coffee is really good here so I have a high standard to attain to! I am really enjoying the people side, meeting people in the café and chatting to people. There are a lot of British tourists who come in here, and they are often surprised to find a Brit working in Reykjavík…I work with some great people as well, so it´s a lot of fun.

24-7 Prayer week

We held a week of 24-7 prayer at Café Rót in central Reykjavík in the lead up to the Global Day of Prayer on 23rd May. We ended with a service in the Lutheran church in Kópavogur called Digraneskirkja where people from many different churches and denominations came together to pray for Iceland. We are partnering with YWAM (Youth With a Mission) to open the prayer room here regularly. The prayer room is downstairs in a former strip-club venue, which is now a café run by YWAM. The prayer room is the room where the strippers use to get changed! I love it when prayer rooms are set up in the most unlikely venues. I will post further about this room and explain a bit more about the 24-7 prayer concept soon.

Parents visit

My parents visited me for a week in the middle of May and we had a great time in Reykjavík and took a trip to the countryside as well, we did the Golden Circle (the national park Þingvellir, Geysir and the dramatic waterfall Gullfoss) on the first day and stayed at the lobster-fishing village of Stokkseyri on the south coast. The second day we drove west via Skálholt and up to Stykkisholmur on the Snæfellsness peninsula. I have been to all of these places before, but they are stunningly beautiful and I never tire of driving through the open vistas and dramatic landscapes of Iceland. We had some nice meals out and some fantastic fish in Stykkisholmur.

Community meals

We have continued to have our open-house community meals every Tuesday, which have been great. New faces in May include Veronica from Norway and Jórann Inga who is a friend of Eric and Katie´s who has just returned from Switzerland. My parents helped me cook a courgette and parmesan soup when they were here. I love hospitality, I just love having people over for food, conversation and laughter.

UK election

I stayed up all night to watch the UK election on 6th May with Carl, a fellow Brit who lives here in Iceland. We got some drinks and snacks in and settled down into some comfy sofas in the basement of Café Rót and watched all the action live on a huge widescreen TV via the BBC website. To many people this would appear weird, but i love a good election, with all the stats, swings and surprises unfolding during the course of the night. The British make an election into a real drama, and this was perhaps the most dramatic yet with no party with a majority, and all kinds of rumours about how the parties would form a government and who would be Prime Minister. Normally this is clear by about 4am in the morning, but this time it would be a week before a government was formed. I will comment more about the election shortly in a separate post and my thoughts on the new government.

Testimony

I have had a couple of opportunities to share testimony of some of the things God has been doing in my life. At Catch the Fire church in Reykjavík I talked for 5 to 10 minutes about the reason I have come to Iceland and my desire to create space in my life for intimacy with God, and to pursue some of my creative and lesser used gifts. You can read more about this in the post New adventures. I also got chance at another church, UNG, (which means Under God’s Grace in Icelandic) to share about how I had a lot of trouble sleeping last year. I would often wake up repeatedly in the night, often have bad dreams and dark thoughts. I got some friends in London to gather round me and pray for me in February of this year as I was getting really tired from the lack of sleep and disturbed sleep. They prayed for God’s peace and freedom in my sleep. From that day on I have slept deeply- in fact I can’t remember ever having such deep sleep as I have had since the day my friends prayed for me, I go to bed now and most nights am asleep within 10 minutes (it often used to take an hour!) and I also have trouble waking up now! So I thank and praise God for this breakthrough in my life, it has made such a big difference!

Will be posting more regularly from now on so keep reading!

After parking the jeep and ‘layering up’, we set out on the steep ascent up a popular hiking trail towards Fimmvörðuháls, where the volcano is erupting. We know it is unlikely we can get all the way to see the crater, as the path is apparently closed, but our aim is to at least see the lava flows from the volcano. Steven has already marked on the map the area of the lava flows and our route takes us right up near them. Knowing it´s only the beginning of spring, and this is Iceland, I put wear about six layers. Incidentally, this is to avoid the repeat of an occasion when I was 18, when I got hyperthermia when I climbed Mount Snowdon in Wales, wearing only a t-shirt and a cagoule. (Well, and trousers and hiking boots of course, but you get the picture). We also have backpacks with lunch, water supplies and cameras, extra layers and a torch in case we have to come back in the dark. Feeling very well prepared, at first, we begin the steep ascent and I within ten minutes I realise I am sweating as if I am wearing a bear suit in a sauna. So, off come four of my six layers until I am just in a couple of t-shirts, and I almost feel like I could have dressed for the pool as the warm sun beats down on us and there is barely a breeze.

The scenery around is breathtaking, and this only intensfies the higher we climb. There is little indication that the beautiful Markarfljót valley below will be flooded in just two days time from the second volcanic eruption which would soon be making headline news around the world. The climb is steep, and precarious in places. At certain places ropes are attached to poles embedded in the ground, so you can haul yourself up over almost vertical slippery rocks. At one point the path is just wide enough to walk along a narrow ledge, and I remember the sign we saw at the beginning of the path saying ‘people who have a fear of heights should not take this route’ or something to that effect. This is, in my definition, a ‘proper’ hike, one where one slip would be lethal, but at the same time exhilerating. No doubt this would be tame to some of my adrenaline junkie friends who would probably prefer to roller blade up the path on one leg while juggling hot lava or hang off the edge of a precipice nearby attatched only by a piece of blu-tac, but I think we probably all have an inbuilt ‘danger threshold’ which is directly related to how accident prone we are. This was not quite at the place where the danger and accident prone lines on my personal graph intersect, but getting a little near. I’m defintely going to push this one while I am here…it is Iceland after all.

We reach a small pile of rocks, which is perhaps there to enable weary hikers to take photos and look like they have acheived something really impresive, when in reality the steeper part of the climb is still ahead. This involves a hike sideways over a steep snowy slope to reach the plateau known as Morganheiði. It´s hard work and I realise how much more running and gym time I need to make me really fit. But we eventually get there,  and this time I am sweating even more than before, like someone wearing an extra-thick electrically heated winter thermal bear suit in a sauna inside a crater during a volcanic eruption. Once up the top, however, the air is cold and I am grateful for the extra layers. The snowy plateau is bright and pleasant to walk upon, and we make a detour from the marked path to go and view the lava flows deep below the edge of the plateau. The lava is perhaps not as dramatic as I was hoping, instead of red fiery liquid running at a pace down a mountainside, the lava is a wide, black, barely moving flow, almost indistinguishable from the black volcanic rock sourrounding it, which itself was once lava. But what was impressive was the amount of steam the flow was generating and this hissing, crackling sound echoing fearsomely around the sides of the mountains to a human audience of just four.  

From time to time small airplanes and helicopters would circle round overhead, carrying tourists to view the show from the comfort of a chair, and no doubt costing an arm and a leg. Our trip cost the price of a day’s jeep hire and petrol, and it felt like we had earnt rather than bought the impressive views.

We walked all the way around the eastern edge of the plateau and then realised we could potentially go further, maybe a hike of another two hours to view the actual crater itself. Rising above the plateau at the far side was yet another mountain, far steeper and icier than anything we had negotiated so far, and only accessible via a narrow snow-covered ridge.

My sense of adventure and my sense of self-preservation sat down somwhere in my head for a frank discussion and I felt like I was spoiling the party by suggesting to the others that we did not go on, as it was about 6pm and we would be making most of the return journey in darkness if we were to hike another two hours. But self-preservation won, and we began our journey back across the snowy plateau, this time keeping to the marked path, indicated by blue poles protruding from the snow at regular intervals. The decision to turn back seemed vindicated as a sudden grey, dank cloud descended on the mountain and visibility reduced.

I began to head back a little bit ahead of the others, feeling cold and wanting to keep moving. I carefully followed the poles, and what was straightforward at first then became gradually more difficult as the snow got deeper under my feet. Without warning the snow then gave way and seemed to have melted into cold water underneath, as if we were walking across a frozen river. I carried on, realising I couldn’t go back but forwards was also difficult. It felt like an allegorical scene from Pilgrim’s Progress or the Lord of the Rings, with the unlikely hero wanting to deperately walk on but sinking down into cold murky water deeper with every step. (The main difference being that I did not have a ring to throw into the volcano and was not being chased across the plateau by a strange alien-like creature mumbling ‘my precious‘) Eventually I was up to my knees in sub-terranean icy water and I wondered if the next step forward might lead to me completely disappearing into some kind of murky underworld ruled by volcanic elves or icy rotten-shark eating trolls. Steven did the heroic thing and filmed me on video camera. At least if this was my last day on earth, someone would have filmed it and given the general public some slightly dark and twisted laughs on You Tube and I would have become known as the ‘Englishman sinking into the volcano’ with 15 million internet hits to my name. The others also had sinking issues, but for some reason, known only in the heavenly realm, I sank further than the others, cold glacial water pouring over my hiking boots and socks.

At this point I should probably point out one of the basic rules of hiking- don’t wear jeans. Unlike lightweight trousers, jeans -once wet- like to take their time getting dry. I knew this before I set out, it’s a no brainer. And yet I still did it. It seemed so nice and sunny at the bottom and jeans so comfortable and warm. Thankfully Eric had lent me some waterproof trousers and I managed to get ahead of the others once again and take off my jeans and put on the waterproofs before our descent from the plateau. For some reason I find it much easier to climb mountains than descend from them. I think this is primarily due to my poor sense of balance, or maybe again my accident-prone tendencies. Maybe its psychological. But whatever the reason I soon found myself slipping over on the steep snowy slope we had climbed earlier. The first couple of times I managed to drag myself up and re-gain my footing, but the third slip sent me sliding on my rear end at speed down the slope while I tried to grab on to protruding twigs or rocks. I managed to grab onto a boulder and get back on my feet, but in trying to walk back up the steep slope to the path I once again fell over, this time sliding on my front even further down the slope. Sometimes I think I am a real-life version of a kind of Inspecter Clouseau type character from the old Pink Panther movies, managing to make the easiest of tasks look unnecesarily difficult and ridiculous. Before you think I am being too hard on myself, maybe we all have an Inspector Clouseau element to our lives, something which to everyone else seems easy but we always manage to do it spectacularly wrong. I like to think I’m in good company. I think as long as we can laugh at our weaknesses and enjoy our strenths than little harm is done.  Think of it as entertainment which you can provide to others from the goodness of your heart.

So, after the snowy slope antics, the descent got easier and we witnessed a beautiful sunset as we began to ache and thirst our way to the jeep. Upon our return, a man with a shiny Red Toyota Hilux was apparently waiting for us. He seemed to be some kind of mountain rescue guy, getting to hang around with his friend driving amazing vehicles and picking up stranded hikers and tourists in one of the most beautiful parts of Iceland. He asked us if we were the last ones down, as if he had the keys to the mountain and wanted to make sure no-one was left on it before he locked it up and set the burglar alarm for the night.  We got chatting to him and apparently the vehicle he was driving was the one used by the Top Gear team from the UK when they visited the volcano the week before. It had also been to the North Pole and back, and was looking in remarkably good condition. The man had also been the driver of the Top Man crew, expertly negotiating the glacier for 10 hours in bad weather before driving so close to the lava that the tyres began to burn. You can see a picture of man and machine below. As we made our way back, interpid mountain rescue driver man drove ahead of us to show us how to negotiate the first and most dangerous river in the jeep in the dark, so we could make it safely back to the road through the valley. We drove the nearly 3 hours back home feeling tired, cold, wet but satisfied with an adventurous outing and the spectacular beauty we wintnessed. Oh…if you ever meet Carl, ask him how many hot dogs he had from the service station on the way home…..

Slideshow of photos from the hike:

As promised, more details and photos of my hike to the original erupting volcano at Fimmvörðuháls on 12th April. In case you´re not familiar with the long Icelandic place names, Fimmvörðuháls is only a few miles from Eyjafjallajökull, where the 2nd eruption happened on 14th April that spewed millions of tons of ash into the atmosphere and brought Europe to a standstill.

I travelled with my friends from YWAM, Steven (from Holland), Carl (from UK) and Mayke (married to Carl and from Holland). Steven hired a jeep from a company called ‘Cheap Jeep’, which sounded a bit like the 4WD equivalent to EasyJet. However, the jeep was more than adequate for the drive ahead over rough terrain, and even included a searchlight on the roof which was a lot of fun on the way home in the dark. We had decided to hike to try to catch a glimpse of the lava flows from the original volcanic eruption which began on 21st March in between 2 glaciers at a place called Fimmvörðuháls (pronounced something like Fimm-vir-thu-howls). We set off at about 9.30am from Reykjavík in the jeep on the 2 hour journey to the Þórsmörk valley (pronounced Thohrs-mirk). Þórsmórk is a valley surrounded by mountains and is a very popular hiking destination in summer, and in July thousands gather at a campsite at the end of the valley for a kind of unofficial festival. It’s apparently the warmest place in Iceland in the summer and the coldest in the winter. Once we turn off Route 1, which is the main road circling the whole of Iceland, the road soon loses its tarmac surface and can only be negotiated by a four-wheel drive vehicle. Several rivers cross the unmade road and so you have to drive across them, although they are fine by jeep, a normal car would probably come to a miserable end. Apparently they are worse in the summer, because the rivers come straight down from the glacier. With the increased heat, more water melts, swelling the rivers. We successfully negotiate the rivers, sometimes having to slow right down because of the steepness of the dips in the road where the rivers are located. We pass a beautiful glacial lake, where a tongue of the Eyjafjallajökull glacier glides dramatically down to kiss the valley. You can see this in the photos below. It’s crazy to think that 2 days after our visit, the glacial volcano would be erupting, sending huge volumes of water down this glacial tongue and flooding the very valley along which we were driving.

The drive along the valley took the best part of an hour, and as we were nearing our destination, we found ourselves before a series of deeper, rushing rivers and a road which had literally disappeared. The surface of the ground had suddenly shifted from gravel and small loose stones to larger boulders and rocks. I must admit I had doubts as to whether even the jeep could handle this, especially the rivers which were much deeper than anything we had previously driven through. But we progressed slowly, with Steven and Mayke’s cool and calm driving and, despite being shaken around a bit, we made it to the final river. This river was fast, deep and looked uncrossable. Steven jumped out to try to find the best place to cross. Fast moving white water was apparently better than the still water areas, which meant the river was deeper. We picked a spot and just drove through, hoping we wouldn´t suddenly drop into a deep pool or be carried away with the current, but our fears were unfounded. I was impressed that Cheap Jeep seemed to be unfazed by this little jaunt. After some more boulder-traversing, we found the elusive road once again and soon arrived at the Básar campsite, from where we could continue on foot up the mountain.

See photos of our drive below:

Blog about the hike itself and more photos to follow soon…

Tuesday 6th April

Community meal. I cooked Pad Thai for 12, after Eric pointed me in the direction of a small Thai supermarket about 10 minutes from home. They had run out of dried shrimp so will make it again soon with the dried shrimp (I think it makes all the difference) but it seemed to go down well…was great time though, we have so many nationalities eating together here every week and so many interesting and diverse people. People seem much more ready to come to dinner after first meeting you than we would do in UK where we tend to be a bit more reserved and cautious.  I love hospitality so am really enjoying it here.

Wednesday 7th April

Felt a bit lost today. Was wondering what my role is in Iceland, how I fit in, how I can use my gifts, wanting to know the plan. I needed some space so I went for a walk this afternoon and chatted to God as I walked round Reykjavík with my camera. The sun had just come out after the rain and I really felt like God was showing me beauty in the hidden places, down each alleyway was something interesting that people passing by would not normally notice because they are moving too fast. I felt like God was reminding me not to rush, not to feel like I have to come up with a big plan, not to dive headlong into endless activity but to take it slow, and let God lead me to the people and places and tasks that he has for me. I was reminded again to do the things which are on my heart, and that the open and vulnerable heart is the meeting point of heaven and earth, man and God. It’s a hard thing for me to learn to follow my heart instead of doing things out of a sense of duty, and to avoid filling my life with endless activity just for the sake of it. After my photographic stroll I sat for a while in Hallgrímskirkja, the main Lutheran (state) church here in Reykjavík. I love the church because it is so simple, light and airy, not dark and foreboding like some big churches in other countries. I sit and pray in the church and realise the main feature is the space, the minimalist feel to the building draws you to the space which is only bordered by the plain grey-white walls and high arched ceiling. It is in this space which God´s presence is allowed to take centre stage, not competing with paintings, statues, tombs and frescos.  I feel this is to be a picture of my life, creating time and space for God to move, and not being distracted by the structure and framework where the space sits.

See some of my photos below:

Friday 9th April

Eric and I joined a gym today. Before you think I’m being irresponsible with my money, this is the equivalent of 27 pounds per month for an amazing luxury gym for much cheaper than a basic gym with poor equipment in London. This is why it´s such a good idea:

1. All the equipment actually works.

2. You get a magnificent view of the sea and mountains from the warm-up area while you are stretching.

3. Included in membership is entry to the outdoor saltwater swimming pool with steam room, hot tubs and jacuzzi bath.

4. There’s a sauna in the changing room.

5. The gym is in Seltjarnarness, just west of Reykjavík. It’s about a half hour run from where I live so I can run there to warm up and wind down in the hot tubs.

6. It has entry by retina scan, so you put your eyes by a scanner and it reads your pupils and says ‘you have been identified’ then the doors open. Very much like the film ‘Minority Report’.  It’s interesting that the security at the gym is much greater than any airport I have been to. But kind of cool. So, let me know if you want to go and I’ll lend you my eyeballs.

I have been doing loads of exercise since I have been here, running three or four times a week and going down the gym three times a week, and feeling very healthy for it! Let’s hope I can maintain it.

Saturday 10th April

Go to hear one of my favourite bands Hjaltalín who are playing at Cafe Rósenberg just round the corner. I could actually hear the Friday night gig from my kitchen, and was glad to hear that they were playing on Saturday night so I could hear them properly. This was my 4th Hjaltalín gig, I heard them twice in London and once at the Latitude Festival in Suffolk last summer. Their new album, Terminal, comes highly recommended by me. This was probably my favourite of the four gigs I have been to, they played lots of new material from Terminal and a few very well done covers in their own unique style, including a version of Michael Jackson’s ‘Don’t stop til you get enough’. The band is a 7-piece band consisting of a female lead singer, male lead singer and guitarist, bass, keyboard, drums, bassoon and french horn. They have a unique style of indie-pop-disco and cleverly combine the use of modern and classical instruments into catchy memorable songs. Check them out on My Space.

Sunday 11th April

Today we help our friend Telma and her daughter Alexandra to move home. Our friend Keli has a van and in three or four trips we manage to move all her furniture and belongings. Their new flat has a stunning view over Kópavogur and Reykajvík. This evening I go with Eric, Katie, Telma and Keli to dinner at the home of Eduardo, a Chilean man that Katie met at a salsa class. He lives on the outskirts of Reykjavík and cooks us a succulent slow-cooked leg of lamb enjoyed with a glass of fine Chilean red wine. Eduardo is a selective fish breeding expert and Taekwondo instructor and also extremely hospitable, we had a great evening of conversation and laughter.

Monday 12th April

Today is the day of a big hike up to see the volcanic eruption at Fimmvörðuháls, which began on 21st March. I go with some friends who work for YWAM in Reykjavík. I’ll write a separate post about this with photos of the hike…watch this space!

Tuesday 13th April

Community meal again this evening, Eric cooks a great chicken noodle soup and we have about 12 people along of 7 different nationalities including two new Slovakian friends- Barbara and Adrian, and a German friend Sarah. I think we should see if we can get into double figures with nationalities at community meals!

Wednesday 14th April

Iceland hitting international headlines again with a second eruption, this time under the Eyjafjallajökull glacier which sends a huge ash plume 20,000 feet into the air. I have photos of this glacier a couple of days before the eruption when we hiked up to the first volcano. Photos to follow soon!

Thursday 15th April

Wow, crazy that the 2nd volcanic eruption has had such a huge impact on the whole of UK! The first time since 9-11 that all flights in UK have been grounded. In Reykjavík we are largely unaffected as the wind blowing south and not west. Interesting times…more thoughts on this is my next post.